meme writing anon.pdf

Media

Part of covid meme assignment

extracted text

You’ll Get Your Pizza Or So Help Me God

Alt Text: Text saying “The world: *is ending*. Food delivery workers:” then a picture of
spongebob and squidward in a powerful wind storm , with spongebob singing “Krusty Krab
Pizza is the pizza for you and m e!”

So during 20 19, the world was hit with a pandem ic in the form of a deadly virus called
covid-19. Despite ostriches not being known as an Am erican sym bol, the United States did
it’s best im pression of one by slam m ing our heads in the dirt and pretending there’s not a
problem until it’s too late. (Fun fact, ostriches don’t do that because they’re frightened, they
do that because that’s where their eggs are stored. Just pretend that m etaphor still works).
Anyway a few m onths into 20 20 our government m ade the shocking discovery that there
actually is a deadly virus killing people all over the world and people started taking it seriously

(kind of). It was during those months that I found out something horrifying too: I was out of
m oney.
So I started applying to jobs in the sum m er to try and get som e m oney to tide m e
over for the next school year. A few places called m e, including Dom ino’s on 10 th Street.
And as you m ight have guessed from the m eme; I ghosted that interview and went to Papa
John’s two weeks later. I don’t know why I did that either. I wish I didn’t because they paid like
$5 m ore an hour, on top of other things that I’ll get into in a m inute.
So I joined Father Johnathan’s as a new delivery driver and I said “put m e in for as
m any hours as I can take”. And they did, and wow I didn’t know that I could take working 50 60 hours a week with no vacation for 3 m onths. I opened alm ost every m orning, and worked
12 hours 5 days a week + a 6 hour shift. I had one free day. And that was if it wasn’t busy and I
actually got to go hom e on tim e. On top of that, we had a m anager couple who always
worked together, had the sam e nam e, and m et eachother working at Daddy Johnny’s. I feel
like John him self m ade them in a lab to work for him because there’s no other way they exist.
And they were terrifying, one slip up and the whole store including the poor custom ers
would know about it. Som ehow I never invoked their wrath, m aybe cause I was one of two
people that were willing to open in the m ornings and they didn’t want to lose m e. But I didn’t
try m y luck.
I was there delivering pizza’s day in, day out, rain or shine, even when the roads were
flooded and I was stressed and overworked like crazy. Working in the rain was the worst not
only because of driving but because of the giant rain coat I had to wear which was way too
warm for the sum m er heat. Covid restrictions were in full effect too, I wore a m ask wherever I

went, and standard protocol for delivery was sitting the pizza box in front of the door,
stepping a few steps back, and letting the custom er pick up the pizza them selves. I always
felt bad for the poor old people who struggled bending down to get it, but whenever I asked
they said they didn’t want help.
But at the end of the day, through all of that, I m ade sure every pizza m ade it to every
custom er, hot and ready, on tim e. And hey, the tips were nice. The em ployee discount could
use som e work though, Pappy Jonas.